I quit alcohol for 390 days and something weird happened

First, you take a drink. Then, the drink takes a drink. Then, the drink takes you.

I want to share with you one of my biggest "wins" of my life...

It was saying NO...to...the courage liquor.

I never thought life would be fun....because no great party happened over a salad...

But...I got it so wrong.

Let's be clear. I do enjoy the blurry memories I have (even though they are very blurry because I was either sober or absolutely shit-faced)....but I do enjoy waking up fresh and working on my business more....

Let me tell you my story of several failed attempts of quitting alcohol....and how I finally beat the liquid devil.

As you know by now, I was raised by my grandma who HATED alcohol. She shamed anyone who was a drinker....So how the fuck did I turn into a low-key alcoholic?

I remember when I had my first sip (Do you remember yours btw)...It was at a friend's house party, we were all underage (duuuuh, obviously) and it tasted absolutely.....AWFUL...But that didn't matter because if the boys drink, you drink. Can't afford to drop to the bottom of the social hierarchy, right? (.....)

The real trouble started when I became a bartender to generate some $$$. 

If you sell something you need to know the product, right?Ultimate cope to normalise getting drunk on the job^^

Or maybe it was a cope to deal with the initial shock of seeing grown up adults get absolutely shitfaced every weekend....

You know how the saying goes - You are the result of your environment...
So, if you constantly see grown up adults get drunk you believe it's normal...(Duh, by now I know that whatever society does, I should do the opposite)
But deep down I used alcohol as an escape.

An escape from the emotional pain caused by finding out at the age of 15 that my mum wanted to give me up for adoption and my dad was really having a hard time being a dad, aka. he just didn't show up as a dad..

Throw in an auto-immune disease (Psoriasis - don't google it, or at least not when you are eating) that got activated because of the emotional trauma and you have a perfect mix of self-hate, unworthiness and shame.

So fast forward a couple of years and I had moved to London ...to work in Finance...
Where going to the Pub on a fucking Monday at lunchtime was normal...
And doing coke was normal (and I don't mean the red beverage...)

Every weekend, I would head to the pub with friends and down a few drinks to help me unwind, do a few lines to feel good and then get absolutely ballistic in "Degenerate city". 

That degenerate city gave me the illusion of "feeling good".Numbing the pain from the job I hated where I wasn't allowed to use the loo when I wanted because "the markets never sleep"...(Who gives a fuck?)

However, over time, I began to FEEL that my drinking was causing more harm than good (kind of obvious but you know....takes time to actually ADMIT it)
I was steadily losing control over my life, steadily.

I was WASTING a lot of money (spending like $500 every weekend) and every Monday morning was a dread.
My auto-immune disease (red rashes) got so bad that I had to see a doctor and do light-therapy (70% of my body was covered in rashes)....

One Monday morning, I woke up and was like, this is it....
You know, I was in the bathroom looking into the mirror and I could barely fit into my jeans anymore.I hated the look of my body. The rashed on my skin.The puffed face.

I was so fucking ashamed man, and so angry. For months I had promised myself to stop drinking but I only lasted for like 1 or 2 weeks max...
But that Monday morning was different....

I'm an all in or all-out person....Love, life, business.
I was determined that this time, I will fucking make it...
And I did Legends.

I went without alcohol (and sugar) for 13 (!!) months...
It was one of the most profound experiences of my life.
And I want to encourage you to do the same.
Make your own experiences...

But i want to give you a little taste of that awesome life without the liquid devil....
Here's what I learned:

The first few weeks were difficult man. 

I found myself craving alcohol, and it was tough to resist the temptation. So, it really depends a lot on mental will power.

And there's only so much willpower you have in a day.

Like, one day, it was  a hot summer day I went to a pub with a few of my friends and I proudly stayed SOBER but I realised one thing..... THIS FUCKING SUCKS!!

You know when you are drunk and you THINK that whatever you say makes sense...?! The absolute shite my friends were talking off which 99% didn't even make sense...

All I heard was:"Gene, adhaddalhjasdjhadshadjasdpyuwryrw$%@%%"
Man, it really tested my patience...

After 2 hours I had enough and left because I was unwilling to lose any more brain cells!

The following months I received more messages like:" Why are you not going out anymore bro?"

Hurts but I decided to prioritise my health over wasting my weekend.
As I began to abstain from alcohol, I noticed several massive changes in my life:

- I was less aggressive. I had way more patience because my amygdala wasn't on fucking fire.

- I lost around 10kg of PUSSINESS aka fat and...and this one was the biggest one...

-I faced my inner demons. My life got "boring" as the average guy would say. Boring because I had more time of the day to get more things done...
And the most important one was facing those inner demons...

Like, you know how you grab food, your phone or go for a drink when you feel sad because that's the easiest way to cope with pain that won't kill you but does hurt a lot.

So, now I had fewer excuses. And instead of waking up in pure agony, a pounding head and anxiety because of the crash after a few grams of coke, I woke up fresh.
Fresh to FACE my feelings.

As a man, the last thing you are taught is to embrace your feelings because you aren't a pussy, right?

That saying is as toxic as fucking seed oils.

And I had the biggest realisation on a sunday morning....A feeling of fullness and peace overcame me...

Have you ever asked yourself WHY you drink?

You drink because you want to FEEL something. 90% of men want to feel confident to be AUTHENTIC. Dance, have the confidence to approach a girl...

Ever realised that MOST men get GAY when they are DRUNK?
Fundamentally, as a man, the ONLY time you are TRULY yourself is when you are drunk...
And that's when it hit me hard.

"I am using alcohol to BE my AUTHENTIC self...I believe that if I am my true self people will not love me"
That was 4 years ago....

I have worked on my confidence, my self-love and self-acceptance. I don't NEED alcohol to FEEL good. To FEEL confident to DANCE or be myself....

It is 2023 and currently the last time I had a drink was on Sandra's birthday (18th January) and I didn't really enjoy the drink.
The last time I got drunk was in August 2022.

I will have a drink here and there for sure. 

BUT life is all about CONSCIOUS decision-making and 4 years ago I consciously decided to DRINK LESS and BE MORE.

So, it's not really about alcohol. It's not really about smoking.
It's fundamentally about FEELING something. 

If you truly want to overcome an addiction, find out what feelings you are seeking to feel.

Then embrace those feelings daily. 

Don't let feelings get in the way of being who you truly want to be.

I hope this hits home for you Legends.